ACORN is organizing to make sure the job of rebuilding New Orleans is done by the people of New Orleans and truly benefits the communities who have been hurt the most.

And, you know, I liked writing humor. Well, I should say, I wanted to write seriously, but it kept turning funny.

Suddenly, people had three phone numbers but never answered their phones.

I had one kid with the birth control pill, I had one with the diaphram and I had one with the I.U.D. I don't even know what happened with my I.U.D. It never came out. But I have my suspicions because that kid picks up HBO.

I have five kids from three marriages. I come from a trailer park. My sister and brother are both gay. I have multiple personalities.

I'm enjoying my life, post-menopause, so much. It's just so great to grow into yourself, and not be bothered with all that tyranny of biology.

Just ten of the Jewish billionaires on this Earth have more than enough to transform the occupied territories into heaven. We can put the 'pal' back in Palestinian.