When I'm a brunette, it's four times harder to hail a taxi. Then I go blonde again, and suddenly there are taxis everywhere.

I don't get star-struck at all.

I have a lot of funny friends, though not everyone's funny all the time. Doon Mackichan's my funniest friend in the pub; Nina Conti's the funniest with a monkey.

I would love to have been around in the Keystone Studios days.

I'm sorry to say I'm very lizard-like. My skin is dry, so covering my face in greasy antioxidants is a better alternative.

My blood runs cold when I hear the 'great news' that we have found a marker for the Down's syndrome gene, which means we can identify it more easily. Why is that good news? It's only good news if you're going to terminate.

The only way I'll ever run a marathon is if I'm involved in the administration.