We live in a fun time with so many ways to express yourself, you would be crazy to be a comedian and not check them all out.

When you’re a bed wetter there’s only one group of people you can feel better than, bed shitters, and unfortunately they’re hard to come by.

I don't like people whose job it isn't to be funny, to tell me what is and isn't funny.

Nothing is taboo if you have an angle on it. That said, critiquing women's human shells isn't my thang. Though there's probably something funny or interesting to be said about those who do it, and what that comes from.

That still feels like the most accurate description - I felt homesick, but I was home.

You have to take the chance to bomb and disappoint audiences.

Everybody blames the Jews for killing Christ, and the Jews try to pass it off on the Romans. I'm one of the few people who believes it was the blacks.