You gotta keep the ball off the fat part of the bat.

I don't know how old I am because a goat ate the Bible that had my birth certificate in it. The goat lived to be twenty-seven.

With women you don't have to talk your head off. You just say a word and let them fill in from there.

Money and women. They're two of the strongest things in the world. The things you do for a woman you wouldn't do for anything else. Same with money.

Avoid fried meats which angry up the blood. If your stomach disputes you, lie down and pacify it with cool thoughts. Keep the juices flowing by jangling around gently as you move. Go very light on the vices, such as carrying on in society. The social ramble ain't restful. Avoid running at all times. Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you.

Go light on the vices, such as carrying on in society. The social life ain't restful. Avoid running at all times. Don't look back. Something may be gaining on you.

The only change is that baseball has turned Paige from a second class citizen to a second class immortal.