Don't eat fried food, it angries up the blood.

I don't know how old I am because a goat ate the Bible that had my birth certificate in it. The goat lived to be twenty-seven.

What's scary in life is not what people know (or don't know), but what they know that ain't so.

The only change is that baseball has turned Paige from a second class citizen to a second class immortal.

I was born in August, no July, 1908.

Not to be cheered by praise, not to be grieved by blame, but to know thoroughly one's own virtues or powers are the characteristics of an excellent man.

Throw high risers at the chin; throw peas at the knees; throw it here when they're lookin' there; throw it there when they're lookin' here.