If you want to live a long time, don't fool with nothing old but money, nothing big but a bank roll, nothing black but a Cadillac, nothing over twenty-two years, nothing that weighs over 130. If you do, you're in trouble. 'Cause when you're getting old and your cells gettin' low, you'll need a Delco battery to boost ya.

Avoid fried foods, which angry up the blood.

I never threw an illegal pitch. The trouble is, once in a while I toss one that ain't never been seen by this generation.

Money and women. They're two of the strongest things in the world. The things you do for a woman you wouldn't do for anything else. Same with money.

It's funny what a few no-hitters do for a body.

I may not be the bestest pitcher in the world, but I sure out-cutes 'em.

Smokey Joe (Williams) could throw harder than anyone.