The surest way to identify those who won't succeed at weight loss is that they tend to say things like "My goal is to lose ten pounds." Weight targets often work in the short run. But if you need willpower to keep the weight off, you're doomed in the long run. The only way to succeed in the long run is by using a system that bypasses your need for willpower.

Life is half delicious yogurt, half crap, and your job is to keep the plastic spoon in the yogurt.

I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else.

Remind people that profit is the difference between revenue and expense. This makes you look smart.

I'm predicting that we'll finally have a computer will search my e-mail automatically and delete every message that begins with 'thought you'd be interested,' and then give an electrical shock to the sender to remind him or her to stop send that kind of message.

Science is a good thing. News reporters are good things too. But it's never a good idea to put them in the same room.

There is no idea so bad that it cannot be made to look brilliant with the proper application of fonts and color.