That's sort of a trick question, and I don't have a trick answer. Next question, please. You're not going to get me with that question today, buddy...I'm a veteran at this, buddy. Can't get that with me, buddy. Not today.

I'm dominant every night. I come in every night and get beat up. I never make a face when they try to flagrant or hack-a-Shaq me, because I'm not from this planet. Earthlings don't faze me.

Some things you just can't question. Like you can't question why two plus two is four. So don't question it, don't try to look it up. I don't know who made it, all I know is it was put in my head that two plus two is four. So certain things happen. Why does it rain? Why am I so sexy? I don't know.

This is my disguise, but it doesn't work.

That's sort of a trick question, and I don't have a trick answer. Next question, please. You're not going to get me with that question today, buddy...I'm a veteran at this, buddy. Can't get that with me, buddy. Not today.

I've read that same formula, but as an athlete I'm classified as phenomenal. You could look it up.

I'm like toilet paper, toothpaste and certain amenities - I'm proven to be good. I've still got 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 years left.