I'm very harsh on real estate agents. I'm not sure why. Maybe it's because of how the call every small house 'charming' and every run-down house a 'great fixer-upper'. Just once, I'd like them to show me a house and declare, 'This one's a piece of crap'.

It's best to love your family as you would a Siberian tiger-from a distance, preferably separated by bars.

I don't like drawing characters facing right. If I tried to do that at a book signing, I'd have to pencil it first.

I was a lawyer for 10 years, and when youre in law, things really have to get done, or somebody sues you. Its a great trick.

If you're from a certain generation, you basically learn to read with 'Peanuts.' It's sort of the template for the modern strip. Its influence ceased to be noticed because it's in everything.

The writing is done on the computer, and the drawing is done by hand. I write, write, write, then I hit the illustration.

Most poetry just confounds me. I really want to like it, but I can't help thinking it's a hoax. (p. 24)