Any two meals at a boarding-house are together less than two square meals.

I admit that when the facts are not good enough, I always exaggerate them.

The landlady of a boarding-house is a parallelogram - that is, an oblong angular figure, which cannot be described, but which is equal to anything

If every day in the life of a school could be the last day but one, there would be little fault to find with it.

I am what is called a professor emeritus—from the Latin e, 'out,' and meritus, 'so he ought to be.

The English are terribly lazy about fighting. They like to get it over and done with and then set up a game of cricket.

Too much has been said of the heroes of history-the strong men, the troublesome men; too little of the amiable, the kindly, the tolerant.