If you're studying Geology, which is all facts, as soon as you get out of school you forget it all, but Philosophy you remember just enough to screw you up for the rest of your life.

I couldn't see his face, because the light came in from behind him and he was in shadow, and he said, "I am Picasso." And I said, "Well, so what?

When your hobbies get in the way of your work - that's OK; but when your hobbies get in the way of themselves... well.

I would like a wine. The purpose of the wine is to get me drunk. A bad wine will get me as drunk as a good wine. I would like the good wine. And since the result is the same no matter which wine I drink, I'd like to pay the bad wine price.

I cannot smell mothballs because it's so difficult to get their little legs apart.

Be so good they can't ignore you.

I'm a bitter, sad, sour young man who makes a career out of hastling people with real careers.