I was very interested in vaudeville. It was the only sort of discipline that was a five-minute act on stage, which is what I really enjoyed and saw myself doing. And I bought books on it.

Rebelliousness really is the province of young people-that kind of iconoclasm.

Writing is extremely personal, and that's the joy of it for me.

What is comedy? Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

Being on Twitter is like having a fern.

It's not what you know, it's what you think you know.

I'm a bitter, sad, sour young man who makes a career out of hastling people with real careers.