I tell my kids, 'I'm your father, not your friend - but I'm also the best friend you're ever going to have because no one is going to care for you the way I care about you.'

Being the father of girls is a kind of illness, in its own way - since any guy who has tried to live in a house with a wife and two daughters is, without any doubt, going to go certifiably nuts.

Moms and daughters can negotiate over anything, and they can go on longer than it took to settle the Vietnam War.

David is the show. There are other writers, but it's David's vision.

There's no such thing as quality time; there's only quantity time.

Everybody thinks they have the answer to how to be a good parent. Here's mine: Everybody's gonna make mistakes.

Sometimes being a dad is like watching a ping-pong match.