There's no such thing as quality time; there's only quantity time.

I tell my kids, 'I'm your father, not your friend - but I'm also the best friend you're ever going to have because no one is going to care for you the way I care about you.'

If it's time for your character to go, it's time for your character to go - you know what I mean? That's it. It doesn't matter who you are.

Moms and daughters can negotiate over anything, and they can go on longer than it took to settle the Vietnam War.

Being the father of girls is a kind of illness, in its own way - since any guy who has tried to live in a house with a wife and two daughters is, without any doubt, going to go certifiably nuts.

Everybody thinks they have the answer to how to be a good parent. Here's mine: Everybody's gonna make mistakes.

I've been offered 'Celebrity Fit Club', where you have to take off your shirt and get on a scale. I got kids, man. I'm not going to humiliate myself. I'd rather drive a cab.