We tend to focus on assets and forget about debts. Financial security requires facing up to the big picture: assets minus debts.

Your goal should be to pay off your credit card bills in full at the end of each month and set aside money toward your emergency savings.

Absolutely invest in retirement. You can always get a loan to get kids through school. I do not know of any loans to get you through retirement. The markets are seriously low from where they were (even though they've gone up 30 percent recently). Now is the time to be dollar cost averaging; the more money you put in, the more shares you buy. Save for your retirement, people.

With success comes unhelpful criticism - ignore it.

I get so frustrated when people tell me it's unrealistic to create an eight-month emergency savings fund, or have money saved for a home down payment, or pay off their $5,000 credit card balance.

We women know how to take care of everybody so well. But the one person we have written out of the equation is us.

In January we start saving money, getting out of credit card debt, funding our retirement accounts, and we're doing wonderful. Then, every single year like clockwork, starting in November, all of you fall into this trap that says, 'I have to buy this gift... I can't show up at this party and not have something for everybody.