For acting, darlings, is the world's most perilous trade. Compared with actors, steeple jacks and deep-sea divers lead snug and placid lives.

Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once.

[To the man who came up to her at a party and exclaimed effusively, 'Tallulah! I haven't seen you for 41 years!':] I thought I told you to wait in the car.

If you know your Bible and your Shakespeare and can shoot craps, you have a liberal education.

Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don't have time.

My father warned me about men and booze but he never said anything about women and cocaine.

Whatever you have read I have said is almost certainly untrue, except if it is funny, in which case I definitely said it.