My father warned me about men and booze but he never said anything about women and cocaine.

I'd rather be strongly wrong than weakly right.

Cocaine isn't habit forming. I should know - I've been using it for years.

Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once.

Don't be taken in by the guff that critics are killing the theater. Commonly they sin on the side of enthusiasm. Too often they give their blessing to trash.

A Republican. A Republican. That's worse than being a goddamned Communist!

If I were well behaved, I'd die of boredom.