I detest acting because it is sheer drudgery.

A Republican. A Republican. That's worse than being a goddamned Communist!

For acting, darlings, is the world's most perilous trade. Compared with actors, steeple jacks and deep-sea divers lead snug and placid lives.

A frozen daiquiri of a scorching afternoon is soothing. It makes living more tolerable.

I did what I could to inflate the rumor I was on my way to stardom. What I was on my way to, by any mathematical standards known to man, was oblivion, by way of obscurity.

My progress reminded me of the horses in The Whip. They raced at the limit of their speed directly toward the audience. But they raced on a treadmill which canceled out their progress.

Here's a rule I recommend: Never practice two vices at once.