Things with my dad were pretty good until I won an Academy Award. He was really loving to me until I got more attention than he did. Then he hated me.

I've overcome neglect and deprivation, abandonment and abuse.

Griffin, my brother, 11 months younger, was sometimes the victim of my father's fury - once Ryan famously knocked out his teeth.

Things get so sloppy when you're under the influence.

I think all of us feel like we're a bit on show, all the time.

The more love I craved, the more distant and abusive he grew. The role I longed to play was never written into Ryan's script: daughter.

I never dreamed that shooting a film would be so hard. There was less regulation then of child actors' hours. Even the concept of acting confused me.