It looked the sort of book described in library catalogues as 'slightly foxed,' although it would be more honest to admit that it looked as though it had beed badgered, wolved and possibly beared as well.

"It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever" he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?"

If women were as good as men they'd be a lot better!

I grow as many of our vegetables as I can, because my granddad was a professional gardener, and it's in the blood.

Using a metaphor in front of a man as unimaginative as Ridcully was like a red flag to a bu... was like putting something very annoying in front of someone who was annoyed by it.

Up until now I'd always though RSI meant 'I hate my damn job'.

I never said nothing..." "I know you never! I could hear you not saying anything! You've got the loudest silences I ever did hear from anyone who wasn't dead!