A hardback's harder at Christmas time because that's a good hardback buying time.

We are monkeys. We like to chatter. Chattering doesn't cost us anything.

The kind of accidents you prefer to call...accidents.

I used to think that I was stupid, and then I met philosophers.

Ah," said Mr Pin. "Right. I remember. You are concerned citizens." He knew about concerned citizens. Wherever they were, they all spoke the same private language, where 'traditional values' meant 'hang someone'.

Mort was already aware that love made you feel hot and cold and cruel and weak, but he hadn't realized that it could make you stupid.

It's still magic even if you know how it's done.