They always gives me bath salts," complained Nobby. "And bath soap and bubble bath and herbal bath lumps and tons of bath stuff and I can't think why, 'cos it's not as if I hardly ever has a bath. You'd think they'd take the hint, wouldn't you?

It's a terrible thing for a man when his woman gangs up on him wi' a toad

William: "I'm sure we can all pull together, sir." Vetinari: "Oh, I do hope not. Pulling together is the aim of despotism and tyranny. Free men pull in all kinds of directions.

Curiosity may have killed the cat, but her's curiosity could have massacred a pride of lions.

The intelligence of the creature known as a crowd, is the square root of the number of people in it.

One day I'll work out what it is you are saying, my lad, and then you'll be in trouble.

Death: "THERE ARE BETTER THINGS IN THE WORLD THAN ALCOHOL, ALBERT." Albert: "Oh, yes, sir. But alcohol sort of compensates for not getting them.