Television contracts the imagination and radio expands it.
Worried about a skin condition? Leap smartly into a bath of porridge.
Don't start drinking before the fifth song.
People who are successful should never forget that its 90 per cent luck. Youve got to be an eejit to be an egomaniac. I had my glory years - Blankety Blank, the talk show, when I was winning every award going.
Who knows what hellish future lies ahead? ... Actually, I do. I've seen the rehearsals.
Sadly, I cant avoid being 75. Like many people of my age, we are all heading towards the grim reaper, and I am clinging on. I just to have to sharpen my fingernails a little so that I can hang on for longer!