I'm celibate. It's not that I'm a religious or moral person or anything, it's just, if you aren't ****ing Thom Yorke, what's the point? Actually, just kidding, Thom Yorke and I **** all the time. Hehehe. Had you.

Every move you make has already been done, and taken the piss out of.

I love listening to music with my mate. We don't do it often, but when we do we'll just sit there and lose our heads in it. Sooner or later he'll start saying something to the effect of "Hey, Thom, can you put in something else now?" but I'll just nod coldly and respond "not just yet". But after awhile, I'll finally budge. And that's when I crack a big smile and take out The Bends and put in Kid A. My friend just sighs and leaves the room, and I can't blame him. He's not ready for that leap yet.

Being in a band turns you into a child and keeps you there.

The pointless snide remarks of hammerheaded sharks

If I could be any famous person, I'd be John Wilkes Booth, because I'd love to shoot Abraham Lincoln in the face

I'm horrified of leprechauns. I'm horrified that I might be leprechauns.