Look at that fat kid, in the audience. You want some pie you little fatty? I strongly dislike fat kids. Security, please remove him, that fat kid, over there, by the pies.

I think a lot of tunes can suffer from being so simple, so either they get over-complicated or their simplicity means the simple way to lay them down becomes the difficulty.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he's a goddamn chicken he doesn't know what the **** he's doing

Time is running out for us But you just move the hands upon the clock You throw coins in the wishing well For us You just move your hands upon the wall

It annoys me how pretty my voice is...that sounds incredibly immodest, but it annoys me how polite it can sound when perhaps what I'm singing is deeply acidic.

People are born with certain faces, like my father was born with a face that people want to hit.

People in bands don't have the kind of conversations people might think they have. The best things about being in a band are the things that are unsaid.