I'm Chris Martin with down syndrome

Every Christmas people are so nice to me, they think I am Little Tim from A Christmas Story. But I'm not. *smiles*

If I could be any animal I would be a pony because then I could have sex with ponies.

I'm terrible at jigsaw puzzles. Other people solve the puzzle but I just keep trying to make the pieces that don't fit fit. I guess that's what makes me special, I try to assemble jigsaw puzzles incorrectly.

If Radiohead were a fruit we would be apples, because apples are festive

It's a fine line between writing something with genuine emotional impact and turning into little idiots feeling sorry for ourselves and playing stadium rock.

I'm not afraid of computers taking over the world. They're just sitting there. I can hit them with a two by four.