Elgar's first symphony is the musical equivalent of St Pancras Railway Station.

As you'll never hear the thing again, my boy, why not throw in a couple of brass bands?

Beethoven's last quartets were written by a deaf man and should only be listened to by a deaf man.

What can you do with it? It's like a lot of yaks jumping about.

If an opera cannot be played by an organ grinder, it's not going to achieve immortality.

No woman is worth the loss of a night's sleep.

A soprano in Massenet's Don Quixote complained that she had missed her entry in the aria, "because Mr. Challiapin always dies too soon." "Madam, you must be profoundly in error," said Sir Thomas, "No operatic star has yet died half soon enough for me."