I figure you're only here for a matter of moments. Ever since I was a kid watching movies I've always wanted to make people laugh or have some sort of emotional reaction.

I like to work a lot with wood. I make furniture that falls apart. I also sew.

I resent my barber when he charges the full cost after he cuts my hair, but he says he's charging me for finding it.

When I watch TV, I'm embarrassed by some of what's on.

I figure you're only here for a matter of moments. Ever since I was a kid watching movies I've always wanted to make people laugh or have some sort of emotional reaction.

Phyllis Diller came through a mine field of male comedians when she arrived on the comedy scene and she defused them all. She won her place in the Hall of Comedy as the First Lady. I will miss her.

If only my folks had beaten me, I could have gotten some material about my miserable childhood. But as it is, I've had a great life.