I had a gentleman in college tell me, during a date, that I could be really pretty if I lost some weight. On a date!

And I can see Russia from my house.

I was a very confident little kid.

I never dreamed I would receive the Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, mostly because my style is so typically Austrian.

The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes. Everyone else is struggling.

I'm more of a writer than an actor, and I used to say that I'm mostly an improviser, though I haven't improvised in awhile.

I think for women especially, you need to have a plan. I need to have some other ways to generate income, so I don't have to stretch my face or lift the top of my head with surgery or something.