Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.

It's a great lesson about not being too precious about your writing. You have to try your hardest to be at the top of your game and improve every joke you can until the last possible second, and then you have to let it go. You can't be that kid standing at the top of the waterslide, overthinking it...You have to let people see what you wrote.

Many of the world's greatest discoveries have been by accident. I mean, look at the Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, or Botox.

Ah, babies! They’re more than just adorable little creatures on whom you can blame your farts.

This made no sense to me, probably because I speak English and have never had a head injury.

I like to crack the jokes now and again, but it's only because I struggle with math.

I think for women especially, you need to have a plan. I need to have some other ways to generate income, so I don't have to stretch my face or lift the top of my head with surgery or something.