When I first set out to ruin SNL, I didn't think anyone would notice, but I persevered because - like you trying to do a nine-piece jigsaw puzzle - it was a labour of love.

I'm still technically employed by the National Broadcasting Company.

You all have got to stop calling each other sluts and whores. It only makes it okay for guys to call you sluts and whores.

Am I just chasing it because it's the hardest thing for me to get and I want to prove I can do it?

This requires a level of delusion/egomania usually reserved for popes and drag queens

I was taken to an examining room where a big butch nurse practitioner came in and asked me if I was pregnant. “No way!” Was I sexually active? “Nope!” Had I ever been molested? “Well,” I said, trying to make a joke, “Oprah says the only answers to that question are ‘Yes’ and ‘I don’t remember.’ ” I laughed. We were having fun. The nurse looked at me, concerned/annoyed.

If you care about [the characters] as if they were real, that always helps.