Genies rarely have nightmares, for the same reason that elephants don't usually worry about being trampled underfoot. With the possible exception of bottles, there's nothing in the cosmos large enough or malicious enough to frighten them, or stupid enough to try.

After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something gives?

Telling lies is a bit like tiling bathrooms - if you don't know how to do it properly, it's best not to try.

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot

Love is an optical illusion that makes you believe the object of your affection is the most beautiful person in the world.

At any given time, ninety-nine-point-nine-five per cent of the human race are a confounded nuisance

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot, sunny day. It's never really caught on in the UK, probably because the last time we had a hot, sunny day was back in 1957.