After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something gives?

Telling lies is a bit like tiling bathrooms - if you don't know how to do it properly, it's best not to try.

At any given time, ninety-nine-point-nine-five per cent of the human race are a confounded nuisance

There’s nothing bad about reincarnation per se, it’s basically a very good system, cost-effective and ecologically friendly.

After all, what else is scientific enquiry of any sort other than a controlled version of banging one's head against the universe until something gives?

New technology is useful, but it's inefficient and ugly; it knows it'll be obsolete by lunchtime tomorrow, so it has no incentive to be anything else

Love is an optical illusion that makes you believe the object of your affection is the most beautiful person in the world.