New technology is useful, but it's inefficient and ugly; it knows it'll be obsolete by lunchtime tomorrow, so it has no incentive to be anything else

Genies rarely have nightmares, for the same reason that elephants don't usually worry about being trampled underfoot. With the possible exception of bottles, there's nothing in the cosmos large enough or malicious enough to frighten them, or stupid enough to try.

Mostly I sit at home in the evenings watching the box and hoping that one day I'll evolve into plankton.

Love is an optical illusion that makes you believe the object of your affection is the most beautiful person in the world.

Lawyers are predators in grey worsted

American-style iced tea is the perfect drink for a hot

Not only had he lost the only girl he'd ever loved, he'd lost her in duplicate, like some heartbroken but highly efficient civil servant.