To me, being funny is more important than making a point, but I don't know. Most politicians are so interested in making points that they don't ... I'd rather be funny myself, and I'd rather listen to somebody with a little sense of humor.

You cant be satirical and not be offensive to somebody.

Counting in octal is just likst counting in decimal--if you don't use your thumbs.

Political satire became obsolete when they awarded Henry Kissinger the Nobel Peace Prize.

I went from adolescence to senility, trying to bypass maturity.

Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down?

The poor folks hate the rich folks, and the rich folks hate the poor folks. All of my folks hate all of your folks, it's American as apple pie.