Base eight is just like base ten really, if you're missing two fingers.

To me, being funny is more important than making a point, but I don't know. Most politicians are so interested in making points that they don't ... I'd rather be funny myself, and I'd rather listen to somebody with a little sense of humor.

In my youth there were words you couldn't say in front of a girl; now you can't say 'girl.'

I know that there are people who do not love their fellow man, and I hate people like that!

If, after hearing my songs, just one human being is inspired to say something nasty to a friend, or perhaps to strike a loved one, it will all have been worth the while.

Don't solicit for your sister, it's not nice. Unless you get a good percentage of her price.

Once the rockets are up, who cares where they come down?