One time I was doing a speech to a group of kids, and just before I get there, I see this little kid crying. I found out they just lost a game, and he was the losing pitcher. I went over there, put my arm around him, and said, 'What are you crying for? When major league players lose, they don't cry.'

No, we don't cheat. And even if we did, I'd never tell you.

Say 'Dodgers' and people know you're talking about baseball. Say 'Braves' and they ask, 'What reservation?' Say 'Reds' and they think of communism. Say 'Padres' and they look around for a priest.

The best possible thing in baseball is winning The World Series. The second best thing is losing The World Series.

Everybody wants to win, but everybody doesn't win.

I've always called L.A. 'the world capital of sport.'

I love doubleheaders. That way I get to keep my uniform on longer.