If people talk about you behind your back, that would mean you are in front, so stay ahead.

A father should be his son's first hero, and his daughters first love.

The best gifts in life will never be found under a Christmas tree, those gifts are friends, family, children and the one you love.

Why do they call it proctology? Is it because analogy was already taken?

Loving someone who doesn't love you back is like hugging a cactus. The tighter you hold on, the more it's going to hurt.

Global warming has taken the place of Communism as an absurdity that 'liberals' will defend to the death regardless of the evidence showing its folly.

We didn't realize we were making memories we just knew we were having fun.