I'm here today because I refused to be unhappy. I took a chance.
Yeah, I had top-secret clearance and everything.
Don't bother me while I'm eating, or when I'm coming out of the crackhouse or something. Just let me get going.
When life gives you lemons don't make lemonade, make pink lemonade. Be unique.
With a black president, I can relax... I can dance in public... I can buy a whole watermelon now.
I'm always thinking of stuff; I just don't sit down and write it. I come up with material more as I go along; if something funny happens, I'll make a note of it on my phone.