You know, when I'm looking at these '08 yachts that are for sale, I think "I could have just walked in with a briefcase of cash and put it on the table and walked out with a yacht."

I think people don't understand that comedy is an outlet for me. Comedy allows me to get outside of myself, and exercise this thing that is still kind of scary to me.

The funny guy doesn't get the girl until later in life. High school, college, everyone still wants the brooding, dangerous guy you shouldn't have.

It's the fastest who get paid and it's the fastest who get laid.

I've got no dark secrets, I wasn't beaten up, my parents were kind to me and there was a low crime rate where we lived. Maybe that's where the comedy comes from, as some sort of reaction to the safe, boring suburbs.

Facebook: What's on your mind? ..Twitter: What's happening? Myspace: Where did everybody go?

If you set up an environment where failing is encouraged then you want to try everything. It's obviously the best way to work.