To you I'm an atheist; to God, I'm the Loyal Opposition.

This stuff tastes awful; I could have made a fortune selling it in my health-food store.

I feel about New York as a child whose father is a bank robber. Not perfect, but I still love him.

Honey, there's a spider in your bathroom the size of a Buick.

My parents were very Old World. They come from Brooklyn, which is the heart of the Old World. Their values in life are God and carpeting.

I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.

Life is full of moments that are good - winning a lottery, seeing a beautiful woman, a great dinner - but the whole thing is tragic. It's an oasis that is very pleasant.