You know what my philosophy of life is? That it’s important to have some laughs, but you got to suffer a little too, because otherwise you miss the whole point to life.

I am not afraid of death. I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Geez, I should stop ruining my life searching for answers I'm never gonna get, and just enjoy it while it lasts.

I can't even make a leap of faith to believe in my own existence.

The best an idea gets is when its in your head.

There are three things Jewish people worship-God, Chinese food and wall-to-wall carpeting.

None of the arts are any good unless you really are great at them.