There are three rings involved with marriage. The engagement ring, the wedding ring, and the suffering.

I think being funny is not anyone's first choice.

Dying is like making love, except you don't get naseous afterwards.

I'm not a drinker, my body won't tolerate...eh...spirits, really. I had two martinis New Years Eve and I tried to hi-jack an elevator and fly it to Cuba.

Capital punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were administered prior to the crime.

I prefer the magic to reality, and have since I was 5 years old. Hopefully, I can continue to make films and constantly escape into them.

You know, it's one thing about intellectuals, they prove that you can be absolutely brilliant and have no idea what's going on.