I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.

What advice would I give the average homeowner to protect himself against burglars? Well, the first thing is to keep a light on in the house when you go out. It must be at least a sixty-watt bulb; anything less and the burglar will ransack the house, out of contempt for the wattage.

Eternal nothingness is fine if you happen to be dressed for it.

You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.

I wish my parents had raised me in Manhattan because I think it's the greatest thing you can do for a kid is to raise them in New York City. I can see this with my own children.

There is no question that there is an unseen world. The problem is, how far is it from midtown and how late is it open?

When I asked my mother where babies came from, she thought I said rabies. She said you get them from being bitten by a dog. The next week, a woman on my block gave birth to triplets... I thought she'd been bitten by a Great Dane.