The audience goes to sleep really quickly! If you have a slight pause at the wrong time, that's it!

Inertia accounts for two-thirds of marriages. But love accounts for the other third.

I don't inhale because it gives you cancer, but I look so incredibly handsome with a cigarette that I can't not hold one.

I keep getting more and more ambitious. Over the years, to some degree, in some areas, I feel I've grown. In some areas, I made a fool of myself. In some areas, I think I can still do some funny things.

I don't own a computer. I've never seen anything online at all - nothing. I don't own a word processor. I have none of that stuff. It's not an act of rebellion. I'm just not a gadget person.

Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that yesterday too, and it rained.

You are always a comedian by default. You are this way because you've been forced to be this way, but it is better to be the hero. So if you can be a persona, the great one of my lifetime of course was and is Marlon Brando.