Marriage is like mushrooms: we notice too late if they are good or bad.

Students achieving Oneness will move on to Twoness.

And Nietzche, with his theory of eternal recurrence. He said that the life we lived we're going to live over again the exact same way for eternity. Great. That means I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.

I've always believed that thoughtful people don't really take the tabloids seriously. They're basically a form of entertainment. I enjoy them as much as the next New Yorker.

Child molestation is a touchy subject... Read the papers! Half the country's doing it!

I'm a comedian. I make comic films and there are certain ideas that occur to me that are comic, with heavy, serious undertones. There are some ideas that are more frivolous to me. The next idea that could occur to me could be comedy about death and famine or something.

Sex is like having dinner: sometimes you joke about the dishes, sometimes you take the meal seriously.