Death is an acquired trait.

The best an idea gets is when its in your head.

And Nietzche, with his theory of eternal recurrence. He said that the life we lived we're going to live over again the exact same way for eternity. Great. That means I'll have to sit through the Ice Capades again.

I don't know what I'm doing, but my incompetence has never stopped my enthusiasm.

How does gravity work? And if it were to cease suddenly, would certain restaurants still require a jacket?

People say that death is a part of life and there must be something to it, but I just see it as bad news and I want everybody to stop sugarcoating it.

When I asked my mother where babies came from, she thought I said rabies. She said you get them from being bitten by a dog. The next week, a woman on my block gave birth to triplets... I thought she'd been bitten by a Great Dane.