I really don't know why we need a whole month dedicated to blacks. It's not like they're the only ones that suffered. I mean, what about us whites? We're the ones that have to deal with these monkeys everyday, but you don't see us demanding a whole month to ourselves.

Dude, writing, acting and directing are such easy jobs. But to do them all as awesomely as Zach Braff does, well that... that's something.

I really don't give a care, I'm going to live for ever

I mean, I know thousands of people died and everything, but if it happened today, there's just no excuse. They'd be much safer inside a movie theater watching one of my movies instead of burning alive in a collapsing skyscraper.

Ever since I was little it was programmed into me that London is where great theatre occurs and all the big shows you love start there.

I'm not an hour late. You guys were just an hour early.

If John McCain were really a war hero he would've won Vietnam.