Damn referees, I'll miss them less than anybody.

I don't understand these new coaches who don't drink. What do they do when they get beat?

The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off.

If I make a set of rules, then a guy goes out and steals an airplane. He comes back and says, 'It wasn't in the rules.'

Finish last in your league and they call you idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you doctor.

They wanted to buy out my contract, but I couldn't make change for a $20, so they had to let me stay.

Doctors bury their mistakes, but mine are still on scholarship.