If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders.

If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.

A church is a hospital for sinners, not a museum for saints.

Psychotherapy, unlike castor oil, which will work no matter how you get it down, is useless when forced on an uncooperative patient.

It is totally unconscionable to subject defenseless animals to mutilation and death, just so a company can be the first to market a new shade of nail polish or a new, improved laundry detergent. It's cruel, it's brutal, it's inhumane, and most people don't want it.

In Biblical times, a man could have as many wives as he could afford. Just like today.

Wisdom doesn't automatically come with old age. Nothing does - except wrinkles. It's true, some wines improve with age. But only if the grapes were good in the first place.